Tragedy of the Commons
September 20 - September 28
Another delay. Apologies. I’m a slow writer and I went back to Boston to get my wisdom teeth out. I told Eva I’d have to miss the Birthday Girl show for the surgery and she asked if I was seventeen. My operation went significantly better than Steele’s—grateful for that. Working to get back up to date.
I ~kind of intentionally kind of accidentally~ removed a string from my mouth that was probably holding my gums together. I’m not going to tell anyone. Will keep you posted as the situation develops.
With my absence, these next two newsletters will rely a bit more on You Missed It’s sprawling network of unpaid interns and campus ambassadors.
We’ve received reports of major label execs watching this blog from the shadows. I’m happy to be a resource, but let it be known that I will need an income again soon. Don’t make me apply to TBA a third time.
Another way I could make some $$ is by writing negative reviews of clubs I don’t like and accepting bribes not to publish them. Part blackmail part extortion. Kind of like the inverse of sponsored content.
I’m open to any and all business ideas. But first, let’s talk events.
9/20 ~ Strange Ranger x Lazlo x Sadie
On the 20th, I rolled up on Baby’s at 7:30 PM. The Strange Ranger crew was huddled outside. Exactly what we need—local legends slamming cigs in the early evening. Can we do this every week? Maybe Harrison comes, the A&Rs start showing up, and before you know it we’ve got ourselves a weekly music industry summit.
Apparently Harrison turned down gigs with Vundabar and Sorry because they weren’t “the right fit.” So if he won’t do it, we hologram him in. It might honestly be preferable. “Girls” on tap. Give the people what they want. Play it every other song.
Part 1 of the Strange Ranger residency was an early show, so someone had to be the fall guy. Lazlo took the hit. But you wouldn’t know from his energy. Killer set. Violin player is so tall. Drummer is a madman.
Sadie played next. She has a low key confidence that works in any room. She never pulls back, but she also never overcompensates. Had so much fun.
Baby’s filled out by the time Strange Ranger got on. A ripping set that ended with a broken guitar. Sadie took a reaction vid and I’m embarrassed of it because I don’t like how my face looks from the side.
9/20 ~ Clovis x Starcrawler
Pretty hype on Clovis. Not sure they’re getting enough attention.
As the Strange Ranger fans filtered out, a new breed of rocker drifted in. No idea where these people hang out. I’ve been in NYC for a year and I have not seen them. A lot of dark green. Earth tones with some red accents. Pseudo military gear, but campy vintage military. Kind of rock & roll pirate energy. Also a wider age range than I’m used to.
* I don’t know the history of the term ‘camp’ or really even what it means so that might be a miss. Just doing my best.
Another personal blind-spot: I can’t differentiate post-grunge subgenres. But I’d imagine Clovis falls somewhere in that web. The bass player looked like a y2k member of Alice in Chains. The drummer was shirtless, and had long dark hair dripping with sweat. I don’t know if he was actually wearing fingerless gloves, but I definitely picture him that way.
I’m typically skeptical of post-punky vocal echo. Usually I think it just obscures nuance in a singer’s delivery. But Ben makes the effect work for him. The echo accentuated the most emotive aspects of his singing. Clovis really blew me away. They made a drumstick twirl seem cool—I really didn’t think that one was salvageable. And they made half-time sexy. Not easy.
Starcrawler frontwoman is a fuckin rockstar. She has hair like a member of Poison, and she was a killer performer. The band’s poppy song structures and matching outfits felt like The Ramones gone Americana. I do wish the guitarist would walk back the facial expressions a little bit.
After the show, I think I ubered over to TV Eye with the Strange Ranger crew, but the memories drop off pretty quickly from there.
9/21 ~ Midtown & Winnie’s
Lucy told me, “I don’t understand your magic.” Still trying to figure out how to read that.
Nancy killed it as Roy Orbison. But I am still unconvinced that Winnie’s is reliable bet for a good time.
9/22 ~ Perfectly Imperfect & Girlpool & Home Sweet Home
Forever grateful to Perfectly Imperfect. Tyler was generous to offer me his +1 for Girlpool’s last NY show. We hit Yia Yia’s Taverna beforehand and really made a night of it.
Girlpool sounded great. Super well-rehearsed. Wasn’t expecting much based on accounts I’d heard of their Baby’s set earlier this year—friends said it was pretty clear that they didn’t want to be playing together anymore. But I didn’t get any of that energy at Elsewhere.
A gen-Z-er standing behind me laughed when they sang, “The internet helps me forget.” Impolite, but also, the times they are a-changin.
Outside, I hung with Jeremy and Sadie. Sadie asked me to announce that she is no longer Anna. Just Sadie. We discussed the stoner aesthetic, and she decided to rebrand as “highper pop.”
Pretty sure Tyler and I ubered to Home Sweet Home with Nina and Curtis from the Ion Pack / The Life. But again, the memories drop off from there.
2022.09.23 ~ Lot Radio with Beth
Met with Beth at noon to see Daniel Avery play The Lot Radio.
It was my first time over there. It’s kind of just an outdoor café. The DJ is in their own room, so you can really only watch them on the TV screen. Killer vibe and a wonderful hang with Beth.
This one work-from-home guy was looking around at everyone while clicking away furiously on a detached keyboard. No evidence of a screen. We made eye contact and his fingers just kept moving. Psycho energy.
“We are writers, creatives, we work remotely”
Beth and I got pizza and then pushed off toward her office. We were walking and someone shouted and ran at us from behind: “Gimme your bags! Gimme me your bags!” Scary shit. You see a lot of crazy in NYC, so Beth and I pretty quickly accepted that this time, the crazy was aimed at us. But it was just Billy Jones in a grey hoodie and Northface slipper shoes. Pretty sure it was all just a publicity stunt so he could get on my blog.
For the rest of the day, Beth and I worked from the Carpark x Firetalk Records office, proving that I am deeply networked into the music industry.
9/23 ~ Horsegirl x Winona Forever x Precious Human
I missed Christian’s set. There. You caught me. What was I doing? Sleeping. Not my best excuse, but not my worst.
Multiple people suggested this makes a bad friend. I will point out that Jack booked the gig, and I’m the one who recommended Christian as an opener. But still—I missed Christian’s first sold out gig and that’s a shame. Mason of Grumpy was kind enough to write a guest column to make up for my negligence.
~ ~ ~
Grumpy, on playing with Precious Human
Christian really is our most Precious Human. He invited his friends into his set and turned the stage into his living room. Christian’s songs are warm and familiar. They make you care about him even if you don’t know him personally. His set is so personal—you can’t help but feel proud like he’s a cherished friend when his sweet songs give you a little kiss.
Precious Human sets feel like a tribute to our community. Christian is generous with spotlight, using it to show off his favorite things; a sloping melody from May Rio, a duet with Kelsea of BLUMS, a Nana Grizol cover, a plucked violin from Awksymoron’s Athena, a brilliant and adorable song by the lovely Jane Lai. Christian puts his friends on his shoulders and shows the audience why they should love them too. Christian makes me want to play shows where the bill is all of my best friends. He is the link that says “we should be doing this together.” And it comes through in his songs. The Precious Human Set reminded me that the best part of pursuing art is sharing it with your friends.
~ ~ ~
(this is Joe again)
I arrived in time for Horsegirl. Jack got them on the bill when Boyscott came down with COVID and had to drop off the bill day-of. Sold out. LFG. Almost like there’s a new sheriff in this big apple and it’s my little brother.
Horsegirl was sick. Seems like everyone knows that though. Didn’t realize they’d opened for Pavement. A high octane trio with tightly wound pop melodies pinning down the noise. I’ll be at the next one, and you should too.
Not important and not necessarily true, but it seems like the 6 string jaguar bass might be having a moment.
The crowd changed visibly for Winona’s set. Not super surprised, but it’s always interesting to see. That band is so pro. There was crazy reverb or delay or something on the snare that made it sound like a massive ‘slap.’ We’ve been friends with them for a long time—played a beautiful show together in Montreal years ago. I love having band friends, and I love these guys extra.
9/24 ~ Frost Children x Club Cringe x Meetka
I showed up to the Lake of Lan event too early. But it probably would have felt too early no matter when I got there. My only gaming experience was going over to my childhood neighbor’s house to play 2002’s James Bond 007: Nightfire. He would refuse to tell me how to use the controller so he could just kick my ass.
But after a bit, I settled into the idea that gamer parties are lit. Felt like walking into a hacker movie. A bunch of shadowy figures standing around giant screens. Another room looked like an elementary school computer lab if the elementary school was in Tron and all the kids had headsets and giant chairs.
Angel was so excited for YourBoySponge’s US debut. She said the artist had just flown in. I asked where from, and Angel said, “Bikini Bottom.” The set was electric. One AyyoPatrick line really stuck with me: “Wanted level / cops on me – there’s several.”
Stopped off to get two biscuits and a sixer before heading in to see Tom. A beautiful night of cigs inside at Meetka’s. I left around 3 AM. Apparently Meetka and Loren kept talking til 7.
9/25 ~ The Life x Phantom Planet
The Life was pretty good. They’d be better with me on bass.
Curtis hit me with a list spot day-of. Big win.
There’s a lot of overlap with what The Life is doing and the kinds of melodies I want to write. The songs are unapologetically straight ahead and unapologetically poppy. Several times during the set I thought of “Come Clean” by Hilary Duff—certified anthem status in my book. Also thought of Third Eye Blind, but I haven’t really listened to them. Jake said Peter Gabriel, but I also don’t really know what that guy is about.
The choruses hit big. Loved the call and response between the guitars in one of the songs. It felt like if Drake Bell started a band but they were good and he was still cool.
Someone in the crowd heckled Curtis’s shirt. He said it’s his favorite. If it was you up there, how would you take it? Renounce your personal style and cave to the tastes of the masses? Or stick by your guns knowing that at least one (very vocal) person thinks you look like a goon?
Phantom Planet was impressive. Unfair that the singer has been that attractive for his whole life. At this point he looks like the lead guy in a commercial for LL Bean or back pain. They played “California” once at the beginning and again at the end. I think that’s a good vibe—a band that’s not embarrassed to have a hit, and not afraid to give the audience what they want.
They had a whole multimedia presentation, which I really didn’t need. It was a 20th anniversary show, but I didn’t realize who they were until I got there. So I wasn’t feeling overly sentimental. It’s cool that Jason Schwartzman was their original drummer, but I don’t need to see videos recorded on his iPhone projected onto a giant screen three+ times in one night. And if you play a video message from one of the Maroon 5 instrumentalists, my main takeaway is inevitably gonna be, “Wow. I guess they couldn’t get Adam Levine.”
The graphics they projected on the screen while they played were insane. Here are some of the images they used:
A countdown with numbers looking exactly like the Instagram app homescreen logo
The Windows desktop background gone 3D
The racecourse from Tron
One special glowing orb set in a magical (completely blue) rainforest
2000s iTunes visualizer graphics
Every kind of time-lapse you can think of
Swirling glitch art
Animated virtual greeting cards
True crime stock footage (feet walking through a city; a closeup of blood dripping from a blade)
Their songs were super consistent—would recommend digging through the Phantom Planet catalogue. But real shows with real bands are way too long. This could be the first time I’ve seen a band obviously plan for an encore, and then not play one because people left.
9/26 ~ Band Prax
Played with Sandra and Jake. Sandra writes beautiful chord progressions. Jake has a small underground practice room that reminds me of my therapist’s office in Boston.
9/27 ~ Turtlenecked x Blaketheman1000 x Frost Children x My Dad x His Boss
Embarrassed to share that I slept through the Frost Children set.
When I got to Baby’s, my dad and his boss were there. My dad drinks cabernet sauvignon, so Tom Moore taped this sign up on the front door:
My dad identifies as a happy guy and says “this might be the best night of my life” pretty frequently. But this one was probably a real contender. Thanks to everyone who hung with him and made him feel so welcome : )
Blake looked like a rock star—in a head-to-toe reflective suit. Real fashion shit. When he took the jacket off, he handed it to me from the stage and I put it on. It was sweaty and stiff. Blake wasn’t dancing as much as he was transitioning between different poses on stage. I thought he was just being dramatic, but when I put the jacket on, I realized his movement was probably actually restricted.
For all of Blake’s horsing around, I do want to say that the dude still has the sweetest line I’ve heard out of NYC:
“I hate to think of a future when you and me have changed”
And then the jubilant nothingness of, “High as fuck on a Manhattan bound train.” At some point I’ll share the Ibuprofen review I wrote way back when Blake tried to hire me as his publicist.
The real question we should be asking isn’t, “Is this the Strokes or Jonathan Fire*Eater.” The face-off of our generation is “Ibuprofen” vs. “Girls.” Which is the defining anthem of this moment in NYC? Or if we want to make it a battle between good and evil—lust and love—it can be “Girls” vs. “East Williamsburg.”
I recently listened to the Blake album in full and decided that we’re all communally missing out if he doesn’t promptly drop the songs just as they were when he texted it to me on January 2. And I want the “Barely Legal” sample in Blake 2. Julian Casablancas once told a dear friend, “I would not dare stifle jubilation.” If he’s really such a chiller, we should be able to get the sample cleared.
I was kind of joking when I called the “Girls” release the watershed cultural event of our time. But things really have felt different since. I’m already nostalgic for a moment that was just a couple months ago. Again, “I hate to think of a future when you and me have changed.”
Harrison hit the stage with a whole new major label swag. It’s so cool to watch a dude who’s worked wicked hard on music for years approaching things with a new sense of validation. I feel like it’s cleared some blockings and empowered him to be confident in his vision. This show was also the first time I felt almost ready to endorse the schoolboy outfit he keeps showing up in.
It was a special night, and I’m glad I got to share it with my dad. He really wants me to date Ashley.
9/28: Ed Schrader’s Music Beat x Godcaster
Godcaster is still as abrasive as ever. Slower. Louder. Less mystical. Von shreds the slide. Eccentric grooves and a lot of weird dude energy. I’m usually turned off by atonal improvisation, but the ambient jam sections felt rhythmically deliberate in a way I thought was exciting.
Also obsessed w Von’s breathy singing. Beautiful melodies with dramatic exaggerated inhales. Godcaster has a lot of range, and there’s a lot of trading instruments. But no matter who plays what or who’s on lead vox, they always sound like Godcaster. Dark, plodding, and mysterious. Made me think of the Willy Wonka scene in the tunnel where everything gets scary for a second.
Ed Schrader’s Music Beat is signed to Carpark so Beth had a +1. Ed’s onstage persona felt like a dystopian casino entertainer. Whacky professor energy. Deep theatrical crooner vibrato.
I think it woulda been cooler without the guitar player. The synth-based songs were my favorite, and I think I would appreciate the hugeness of their energy more if they had a leaner lineup. Cutting the ornamental guitar parts would also leave more space to hear the bass part-writing. My other critique is that these guys do a lot of funny voices. I don’t love funny voices.
They were ripping, though, and they dedicated a song to Beth : )
9/28: Blake x Some Guy
The downtown kids are unhinged. This party was a re-run of the night before that nobody needed.
I say that, but of course, I was there. And I’d do it again.
There were more people on the flyer than there were in the room. Pretty much the same scene as the night before, except the hosts posting about it didn’t even necessarily come (cough cough…Harrison). I had fun dancing during Blake’s set. He played “East Williamsburg” cuz I heckled him and said it was my favorite. May played the one that goes “Take it on back and take it on back and…” I love that one. Also loved her furry coat.
After Blake’s performance, we hung in the side room. Everyone was staring at May’s nachos. Gutes came in looking for Blake. She said there was some kind of conflict out front and asked him to intervene. I didn’t think it was real at first, but it was, and Sasha and I decided to get involved. For the sake of journalism.
All I could gather was that a tall man in a Holden Caulfield hat was pretty heated because someone criticized his music choice. Later that night at the bodega I overheard him tell someone, “I’m really not a drama guy.”
But this was the first time I’ve seen a squabble over next to nothing clear a bar out. Seemed like he really didn’t want to calm down, and he had a bunch of friends backing him up. “Fuck this place,” he said. “This is a fake party. Nobody likes this gay shit.”
On the street, he kept going. One of the friends was trying to plead his case and I overheard Blake say, “I don’t give a fuck. It’s a Wednesday.”
~ ~ ~
Letter to the Editor, by Steele FC, Julia Cumming’s boyfriend
Julia Cumming’s boyfriend’s friend Joe Kerwin only talks to me about my tooth pain.
Which is strange. Prior to my wisdom teeth surgery (that went poorly), we spoke about all sorts of esoteric topics. From the exchange of personal information for free dabs, to Blur vs. Oasis, to everyday applications of quantum mechanics. We’d spend hours discussing the key differences between the cultural status quo of 19th century New England whalers and the dockworkers of New York Harbor.
Julia and I went to Baby’s on the 27th for the Turtlenecked show—did you know btw that Harrison is the author of Joe Kerwin and Anthony Fantano’s personal anthem “Girls”?
On the ride over, I thought through some of my most stimulating conversations with Joe, trying to pinpoint the exact moment that lead him to see me no longer as a man, but instead as a throbbing quadrant of impacted maxillary molars.
I arrived and made the rounds, paying my respects to the titans of the industry who are known to hold court at the venue. I caught up with the esteemed Greg Rutkin. He was donning a pair of ecru trousers, a white t-shirt, and an unbuttoned dandelion yellow dress shirt. He looked summery—fresh off of a yacht. He said he looked like a scrambled egg. Later in the evening I greeted him with a vigorous pinch of his left buttock. It was perfect. We both enjoyed the experience.
Julia asked me to surprise her with a yummy cocktail for us to share.
I ordered a dirty vodka martini. I knew it was as a mistake as soon as the words left my mouth. We pretended to enjoy our glass of enriched saltwater for some of Harrison’s set, and then made our way to the front row to pawn our martini off to Joe. He told me he was getting wisdom teeth surgery this coming weekend, and finally, I understood. His obsession with telling everybody about my tooth pain was merely a coping mechanism to quell the anxiety of his own affliction. I told him I’d always be there for him, and I offered to man the wheel of You Missed It as he recovered from his procedure. To Joe, I wasn’t a man with an obsessive compulsion to discuss my oral wellbeing—I was just a projection of his own nerves.
Appendix B: Memory Lane
This is Joe again. We’ve been friends with Winona Forever and Boyscott for a long time. Played a legendary show with both bands at the Harvard Advocate in 2019. I’m including a picture below because it’s one of my favorite pics I’ve ever been in. Alex from Winona also recorded the EP we put out in 2020. It’s not always easy to look back, but I still feel a lotta love for everything we did : )
That’s it for now. Some legendary guest writers in my next post. Sending love <3
my life is better since finding this blog thank you for your words Joe!